Merry Christmas from our The Scent Series family to yours!
I once had a lover who was amazing in bed. Most times. But sometimes intercourse was painful and we had to reposition, slow down, or stop. This led to some frustration and some trouble areas in our relationship. It also led to working to overcome our challenges. I hope that my experience, as well as my medical knowledge can benefit you in your sexual journey.
There are many medical https://www.webmd.com/sexual-conditions/guide/female-pain-during-sex, and some not-so medical reasons a woman may experience pain during sex. It can be as simple as lack of lubrication, or maybe the package is too big for the container. Of course constant friction can rub even the most sensual of goddesses dry, so if your man is the energizer bunny, adding lubrication can be very helpful. As for mismatched size, it’s partially a matter of physics, but at least as equally a matter of arousal. And when it comes to sex, arousal is HUGE! Possibly even more important than the all-important penis size.
Allow me to elaborate. When I say arousal and penis size, you probably think I’m referring to the pleasure of the man. Actually, it’s quite the opposite. Though penis size matters, do you know what the largest sex organ is? It’s NOT a penis, which, if we’re talking size, on average weighs 1/3 pound. It’s another, vastly more important organ, weighing in at about three pounds, which is….the brain. That’s because so much of the pleasurability of sex for women has as much to do with what she is thinking as what she is feeling.
Back to the feeling aspect- it comes down to a combination of physiology and arousal. Female arousal is such a complex, multi-faceted issue that one could earn a PhD and still lack some understanding of it. For the purpose of this article, I’m going to focus on a specific part, which is the cervix. What is the cervix, you might ask? It’s the button-like, volcano-shaped fleshy mound in the back of the vagina that separates it from the uterus, and other internal reproductive organs. It kinda looks like a doorstop (if the cervix didn’t belong to a person, wasn’t covered by highly sensitive human tissue, and was affixed to a wall). It’s sensitive to pain, and it changes thickness during a woman’s monthly cycle. Why does that matter when we’re having sex? There are many reasons, and I’ll share them with you.
When a woman is fertile, her cervix is softer and shorter. Our bodies have been evolutionarily keyed to continue our species; that is, to procreate. A shorter, softer cervix happens during ovulation, and causes less discomfort during intercourse, making it more pleasurable. Thus, making conception more likely.
If you’re interested in knowing when you’re fertile, or if you’re like me and have difficulty with the effects of birth control on your body, you can feel your cervix to figure out when you’re most likely to conceive. This book can help https://www.tcoyf.com/taking-charge-of-your-fertility/ Use with caution. The Scent Series, as well as the author of that book take no responsibility for your baby making mishaps. To reiterate, sex will likely be much more enjoyable and less painful when your cervix is softer and when you’re most fertile.
On the topic of arousal, keep in mind that when you’re aroused, your vagina elongates, which lifts the cervix, so that it doesn’t protrude as deeply into the vagina. Your arousal alone can decrease or take away painful intercourse. All the more reason to go slow, have fun, make out, and use toys. In fact, you can always do these things in mixed order. That is, make out, get hot and bothered, start sex, pause sex for vibrio-clit stimulation to increase wetness and arousal (and so that your cervix exits your vagina), and then finish sex, orgasming in tandem. Voila! Sex feels better for both of you! Have any comments? Have a sex victory story you want to share? Questions about how you can make your sex life the best it can be? Hit the “contact us” at the top of the page.